Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Oor Referendum - A Series #2

Get ready to reel your eyeballs back in and wipe your exploded brains off the screen of your iPad, as the amazing news breaks that Barclay's Bank are prepared to continue trying to make money in Scotland, even if Scotland makes a particular political choice.

I know this might come as a shock to everyone who witnessed the head of BP declaring that what oil reserves remain for an independent Scotland might suddenly wither before his eyes, taking on a wrinkled and repugnant form that would surely debonify the throbbing, thrusting sex-drive of a major oil conglomerate and its shareholders.  Surely, we can all understand how opportunities to make fuckloads of money can suddenly become unattractive to business because of...

Well, I'm not going to continue in this vein, because we can all see where I'm going.  I'm just going to point out that VerizonGloboPriceWaterhouseAppleBPVirginGoldmanSachsTesco are probably going to continue to try to keep sucking money out of Scotland, even if it isn't quite as profitable as it used to be.

In fact, they might find it even more arousing, because it's easier to demand bribes* in exchange for jobs from a smaller, less powerful nation.

Still, Scotland is a first-world country filled with cash and consumers and where there's profits to be made, multinationals will swarm like bees, or vultures, depending upon how you choose to describe their generally money-hungry behaviour.

Which suggests to me that collectively, as a far larger and more powerful United Kingdom, we might somehow be able to exert some kind of force over both markets and business, and that collectively we could perhaps induce them to do things that we collectively, as a democratic entity, might wish them to accept, even if they don't really want to.

Such as, oh, pay some taxes, or something.  I know it's unfashionable, but the evidence suggests it just might be possible, given historical precedent.

Seriously though, this independence referendum is illuminating, in all kinds of unexpected ways.

*The first bit of dodgery I came across by Googling only the one company  "Diageo", which surely only scratches the surface.


SimonB said...

Meanwhile, from England: "Don't go! Please, please, don't leave us to them! We didn't mean it, we hate them too!"

gilbert wham said...

^^^Or at least take everything north of the Wall with you. Howay, man. Divvint leave waz to the Tories...