Saturday, April 04, 2009

Ferguson, McGregor Frozen Out Of Scotland Team For Brown-Eye Arse Gaffe
BBC News, 3rd April 2009

Scotland and Rangers captain Barry Ferguson and goalkeeper Alan McGregor have been told they will never be selected for the national side again after they were caught mooning cameras during the recent game against Iceland.

"In light of the bare-arsed events of the past 48 hours, the SFA has decided that neither Barry Ferguson nor Alan McGregor will be considered for selection for the national team," said SFA chief executive Gordon Smith in a statement this morning.

"By dropping their shorts, presenting their rear-ends to the media and shouting Blah, blah, blah while mimicking a yakking mouth by repeatedly squeezing together and pulling apart their buttocks, the players have crossed the line."

"Frankly, Scotland fans should be able to watch the national team without having Barry Ferguson's arse rubbed in their faces."

Ferguson and McGregor have expressed regret for their behaviour, and have promised to refrain from any further misbehaviour. "Certainly nothing worse than the odd drunken rampage or punch-up in an Ayrshire kebab shop," the Rangers captain pledged today. "Or maybe a few naughty hand gestures cunningly disguised to make it look like I might just be scratching my face, delivered in a manner that suggests I believe this is both witty and hilarious."

Barry Ferguson is 31 years old.

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