Sunday, November 30, 2008

Video Game Review

Bioshock


Ever been enjoying in an amusing bit of internet chat, only to have some dork barrel in shouting about how the BBC is a Marxist propaganda tool, whose funding is extorted from the people with the threat of official force?

Ever had some joker explain to you with a straight face that all of Britain's problems are due to the existence of welfare, and felt a mad desire to smash your computer to pieces with a hammer?

Well your time has come peeps, for oddball first-person libertarian-shooter Bioshock is now available on all major platforms, and it offers a variety of vicious weapons with which to blast, impale, burn and electrocute a vast array of deranged right wing fruitcakes.

Set in 1960, the game takes place in Rapture, an underwater city that operates on strict Randroid rules, founded by double-handed wingnut wanker Andrew Ryan. The city's ludicrous take on a Darwinist Utopia - basically, I'm Rich, Fuck Off And Die - has inevitably led to society's total collapse. Here, rather than mooching around bitching about smoking bans and lecturing the disinterested and indifferent on the merits of minarchism, the libertarians of Rapture have regressed into capitalism with the gloves off - i.e. killing people weaker than them then taking their stuff, and sneaking around harrassing little girls.

The game is chock-full of moral and political philosophy and offers the player the opportunity to play as hero or villain, but the core of the game is simple - to whack as many right wingers as possible by exploding them with grenades, braining them with a spanner or setting them on fire with pyrokinesis.

A joy to play, this game is a must-have for anyone who's ever been subjected to a lengthy tirade on how it will rain tits and champagne if only everyone agrees to suck down bucketloads of raw, steaming shite about the miracles of the free market and smaller government.

Rating: Like loony-bin victimwank website Samizdata, except you get a flamethrower. Outstanding. 9/10

Update!: For further libertarianism in video games, readers are advised to check out the post-apocalyptic nightmare universe of Fallout 3.

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