Saturday, August 04, 2007

Hands Off My Loaves And Fishes, Hippies

15Then went the Pharisees unto Libertarian Jesus, and took counsel how they might entangle him in his talk.

16And they sent out unto him their disciples with the Herodians, saying, O Great Libertarian Master, we know that thou art true, and teachest the way of God in truth, neither carest thou for any man: for thou regardest not the person of men.

17Tell us therefore, What thinkest thou? Is it lawful to give tribute unto Caesar, or not?

18And Libertarian Jesus spatteth the dummy, and did say, Taxation is a tyranny upon the common man.

19I say unto thee that Caesar must go forth even unto Fuck, for I shall not render a single shekel unto that Onanist.

20And the Pharisees rejoiced, for they knew that Pilate would give Libertarian Jesus a bloody good crucifying, and sent forth for the legions.

21But Lo, Libertarian Jesus hadst not finished by a long shot, and did bend the ears of the Pharisees, saying, Big governorship is inherently self-interested and should be overthrown by a mass movement of individuals.

22Truly, I knowest how to spend my hard earned coin, and no quill-pushing scribe should spend it on aquaducts and such foolishness.

23And the Pharisees became annoyed, and did say, Surely the LORD smileth upon aquaducts, for they hath improved sanitation.

24And, This stuff about smashing the state doth sound good in theory, but surely it is but passing water in the wind, for it shall never work in reality. Nobody shalt go for such nonsense.

25Truly, Libertarian Jesus, thou art wasting thy time and ours.

26But Libertarian Jesus was great in wrath, and did goeth on at great length about negative liberty and natural law.

27And on.

28And on and on.

29And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth, and the Pharisees begged Libertarian Jesus to holdeth his peace, but to no avail.

30And lo, presently the Legion came upon Libertarian Jesus, and gave him a bloody good crucifying.

31And there was much rejoicing and loud were the hosannas.

32And Libertarian Jesus looked down upon the Pharisees and said, Forgive them LORD, for they know not the principles of Minarchism.

No comments: