A quick look at the major news stories of the day before I head to work...
Israel Continues to Hit Palestinians Because it Loves Them
US Criticises Syrian Failure To Elect Anti-American Fundamentalist Extremists: "That Is Not Democracy" - Bush
Chavez Heroically Defends Venezuela From Fascist, Imperialist Criticism Of Chavez
Greenland Admits It "Just Hates Those Fucking Whales"
US Demands Changes to G8 Climate Change Text; Wants Protection In Cases Where Raped Environment "Was Asking For It"
Lebanon Bombs Extremism Out Of Palestinians - Everything Wonderful Now
Bush Nominates White House Dog To Lead World Bank - "Arf!", Says New Chief Barney
Parents Of Missing Child To Enjoy Audience With Elton John
Feel free to note any exciting developments during the day...