Sunday, January 21, 2007

It's Official: Flying Rodent Is A Suckass Dork

I just love to buy newspapers that savagely bayonet fatuous misrepresentations of my opinions and beliefs, so you can imagine my joy when I opened the Observer today to find excerpts from Nick Cohen's latest opus, "What's Left: How Liberals Lost Their Way".

You can click on the link and read it yourself, if you enjoy watching the shadow-boxing of puffed-up moral crusaders. If you're familiar with Mr. Cohen's work, there's not much point. It's the same old schtick, slow baked in an oven of grandstanding and served in a jus of self-justification.

If you don't have the time, try this for a similar effect - draw a Hitler moustache under your nose, then goosestep up and down in front of a mirror shrieking "Ich bin ein naughty boy!".

It'll go down a storm amongst those lefties whose sites are one long parade of wind-up Nazi dolls marching in lockstep with scimitar-wielding clockwork jihadofascists.

All of which is the hot, hot, no-holes-barred pornography of self-righteousness that gives the Decent Left RSI, and inevitably ends with hundreds of predictable historical analogies splattering the comments boxes.

Having just watched Niall Ferguson beat Neville Chamberlain to death with a rolled-up copy of the Nazi-Soviet Non-Aggression Pact, I'm starting to think I'd be better to stop resisting and only posting asinine justifications for our War On Whatever.

Why bother reading all those history books and carefully weighing questions of life and death*, when I could simply shout "Today's enemies are just like the Nazis!" and declare my intellectual superiority?

Now, let's bomb the shit out of Tehran! Hoo-ah!

For more on those lessons from history, Larry has summed up all the academic study needed to establish oneself as a towering intellect of cyberspace.

*Other people's lives and deaths, of course. Certainly not mine.

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