Saturday, July 29, 2006

The New Lunatics...

... Really aren't too different from the old lunatics.

Legend has it that Ronald Reagan once remarked to Gorbachev that, although the US and the USSR were mortal enemies, they should unite in the event of alien invasion.

I say legend, because I haven't been able to track down an authoritative source. But it wouldn't be out of character, since Reagan's cognitive difficulties are well documented.

Nonetheless, like all the best citizen journalists, I'm prepared to accept idle speculation as proven fact and build my entire worldview upon it.

Reagan may have been criticised for being the sock puppet distracting the American people while his cronies looted the treasury (and that's before we get round to discussing the death squads) but it's comforting to note that he was ultimately a believer in the commonality of all mankind, Commie and Crusader alike.

The alien story shows one basic fact - he believed that, in the spirit of our shared humanity, black and white could come together and gang up on green.

I suppose the more time he devoted to worrying about ET, the less he could spend crushing trade unions.

P.S. I was in America during Reagan's funeral, and what I saw there would be worth a lengthy post full of question and exclamation marks by itself. The next time a major politico drops dead, it may be worth revisiting.

It was an instructive lesson in how future revisionist historians will portray the jokers who brought us the current debacle - as saintly agents of peace, pushed into difficult situations by their bottomless faith in the Lord.

Update: The Gipper may be gone, but his spirit endures in Nevada, where you can now be fined up to $1000 for giving food to the homeless.

Vegas is near the bottom of the places on Earth I'd like to visit, just above Grozny, Mogadishu and Beirut. On this evidence however, I'm tempted to re-order the list and throw myself upon the tender mercies of the Israeli Defence Force.

Update II: I'm assuming that when the Israelis use the word "defence" they apply the same meaning that the US "Department of Defense" does. Both spelling and definition differ on either side of the Atlantic.

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