However, I've just finished my daily dive through the trough of right-wing bloggers, and I see that the mental collossi and philosophical geniuses are up to their usual antics. While traversing their ramblings I suddenly had an epiphany - I have now realised the true extent of my power.
This is my American flag, purchased in New York City in 2004.
This is my cigarette lighter.
The message I wish to convey to our right-wing brothers is a short one - quit with the crazy, or ole glory gets it.
I'm setting a time limit - from tomorrow onwards, no blogger accuses another of being a traitor, terrorist sympathiser, objectively pro-Saddam Baathist enabler or elitist latte-sipping bobo. No more "heh, indeedy"s, no more inane analyses of popular movies to back up conservative talking points, not one more mind-bendingly dull "fisking". Any of that shit, and I'm breaking out the lighter fuel.
I understand that it may take time to alert all of the hermanos derechos to the new rules, so I won't take action just yet. But if this nonsense is still going on at midnight GMT, I'll let the sucker touch the ground. If you're still at it tomorrow night then, well, I won't be held responsible.
I'll be sad to do it, since I think it adds a welcome touch of colour to my otherwise Spartan abode, but needs must when the devil drives.